.

.

Note from Jacqui
Goodness me, I can't think straight !!
What happened today is just unbelievable
What are the chances of you two meeting
Can't help but think this has been orchestrated from above !!

Note from Geoff
Hi, Jacqui, and it's Geoff
Sharon loved "the visit" and you can bet she'll answer this tonight !!
We have CrossFit so it will be eight o'clock or so before she gets to write
Tanya Mary pulling the strings, eh !!
See you

Note from Jacqui
Hi Geoff, and I thought I was seeing things !!
I got a text from my sister telling me to check Facebook and there she is with Sharon
I was gob smacked to say the least !! ... and I still am !!
How unbelievable !! ... still shaking my head

Note from Sharon
Hi Jacqui, and I was delighted your sister and her friend made the effort to come and visit me !!
So thoughtful that they took the time ... I am truly touched
It also shows the love you share as sisters because she visited me for you I think
It seems Raelene came to our Post Office one day and saw my tattoo ... HERE
I am not sure what I said but I would have said something ... I usually do if someone makes a comment on it
Goodness knows how the topic even came up between them !!
When Lee said she was Jacqui Searson's sister I nearly fell over !!
I gave her a big hug and felt quite tearful
She was so excited to take a picture and put it on Facebook for you
Another lovely story of how thoughtful people have been to us since Our Beautiful Tanya went to heaven
Love to you all

Note from Jacqui
It is just so unbelievable, Sharon
Raelene lived two doors up from me growing up
She moved to Cairns in May and saw the news about Tanya
She also saw from Facebook that I knew Tanya, so she very kindly sent me the newspaper articles ... which I still haven't brought myself to read ... and took pictures of the "Ride for Tanya" signs, etc ... HERE and HERE
Now I find it very bizarre that of all people for you to serve and show your tattoo, it was her ... and she must have put two and two together
I'm not sure when that interaction between you happened but I certainly was not aware of it and neither was my sister until they were at the chemist next door to your Post Office today
Anyway, I just think it's amazing !!
My sister Lee is just the most beautiful soul and I'm pleased you got to meet her
I am still shaking my head about the fact that I opened up Facebook today and saw the three of you together !!

Note from Sharon
As you said in your post ... Fate !! ... and Tanya !!
I would have loved to have seen your face ... it would have been priceless !!
I must say I am feeling quite warm and fuzzy about this whole episode

Note from Jacqui
My face is still the same ... just total disbelief !!
I feel very warm and fuzzy too and I wasn't even there !!

Note from Sharon


January 2014 ... Sharon to Angela and Fred Muhlemann (Switzerland)

Thursday 6th February 2014 ... Note from Angela and Fred Muhlemann
Dear Sharon and Geoff
What a horrible tragedy you have been through
Words can't express how sorry we are to hear the devastating loss of your beloved daughter
Our hearts go out to you
May you find comfort from your loving memories, strength and support from the understanding of others
Our heartfelt condolences

Friday 7th February 2014 ... Kelly Richardson

I will be thinking of you next week ... just hate that you are going through all this
Was thinking of her at my running group this morning and broke down in front of everyone
Then had to get my shit together as we had a hill to run up and I just couldn't breath !!
Said to myself Tanya would be saying ... "C'mon, suck it up and just run, Kelly !!" ... so that is what I tried to do

Note from Sharon
Sometimes when I am doing crossfit and it gets really hard and I am struggling to breathe I get all teary and feel the loss of Tanya so much
Geoff sees me sometimes and gives me a hug and tells me to have a rest but, like you, I hear Tanya telling me to stop sooking and get moving again ... and I do !!
She is not even here and she is still telling me what to do and I am doing it !!
She is very close to me all day every day
Love to all

Note from Kelly


Tuesday 11th February 2014 ... Jacqui Searson

Thinking of you guys today
And this is how I imagine Miss Tanya unwinds in heaven after putting all the saints through their paces !!
Lots of love to you and you are always in my thoughts

Note from Geoff
I think you got it spot on !! ... 'Miss T' would love a scene like this
And thanks so much for your thoughts
Sharon was upset ... the "nine months" mark is so meaningful to her as it would be to any Mother
I am starting to get angry and I am starting to hate

Note from Jacqui
Oh Geoff, who could blame you
Such a waste ... I really don't know what I would do if I were in your position
I think you have both been amazing
I wish there was something I could do for you
Saying I'm thinking of you seems so insignificant and useless

Note from Geoff
You do so much for us with your contact and thoughts ... do not EVER think what you write and say is "insignificant and useless"
Say it again, and I'll come to Hobart and yell at you !!
Thanks, from Both of Us

Note from Jacqui
LoL ... okay, you've used capital letters so now I'm scared !!
Can't wait to see you in May so I can give you both a big hug and meet you for real !!

Note from Geoff
I'd have to swim to Hobart too ... petrified of those things that fly around in the sky !!
See you in May

Note from Jacqui


Friday 14th February 2014 ... Deborah Doran

The Apple Slice ... I probably will eat the whole thing it was so nice, that is of course if I can replicate it !!
I do have to be good though as I started my fitness journey on the first of May last year and after Tanya's accident I promised to keep going
I have never committed to anything in my life, and to tell you the truth, I wagged every sports day ever in high school cause I couldn't run !!
Now I happily run five kilometres every second day and get on my cross trainer and I have lost well over thirty kilo
What a lady your daughter was ... such an inspiration even after she is gone
I was laying in bed last night thinking about her and how she really was a beautiful soul and what an impact she had on so many
She truly was a happy person running her own race but so thrilled to have everybody else in her life
She always had time for everyone and had such a caring nature
There are not many people that walk this earth like that ... so beautiful
Happy Valentine's to you and Sharon ... days like these can be hard
Sending lots or hugs your way and I hope you both find some time to enjoy a nice glass of wine or two

Note from Geoff
Lovely words, Deborah ... miss that Kid so much ... Sharon will write tonight or tomorrow

Note from Sharon
Hi Deborah, and it is so hard to express my feelings when I hear and see heartfelt comments about Tanya
It is a mixture of pain, love, sadness, happiness and pride
So many thoughts and feelings are expressed to us and it helps me through the days without her
I don't want to be sad all the time ... it's exhausting as I am sure you know
Hearing and seeing what Tanya meant to her friends and colleagues gives me joy and moments of happiness
We are grateful she had a full and happy life
I love how you wrote ... "running her own race but so thrilled to have everyone else in her life"
Another friend said to me her theory was Tanya looked after herself very well and that gave her the energy and desire to be the best daughter, sister and friend she could and making the effort to stay in touch and engaging with all her friends and finding new ones as well
Thanks again for your lovely words
Geoff will send you the recipe in the morning ... it is easy and you will love it !!

Sunday 16th February 2014 ... Trish Nicholls

Love to you both, Sharon and Geoff

Note from Geoff
Hi Trish
And your note came at a perfect time !!
Sharon and I will always keep Tanya's Ghost Bike looking as 'nice' as we can ... she'd want that !!
But it is always so sad when we visit and put up new bright flowers ... and we did this on Saturday afternoon ... HERE
Then your thoughts arrived on Sunday morning ... really very nice
Here is her "New Outfit" ...

And I reckon there's a certain person stomping around 'The Halls of Heaven' in a really bad mood about what is happening at "The Snake Pit" !! ... Article = "Ruthless New Zealand Breakers snap Taipans post-season Pipedream" ... HERE
Our best wishes to you and yours

Note from Sharon
Hi Trish
Every now and then I need a good ol' cry and I had one when I saw the photo of you and Tanya
I am glad you were her friend ( even though you made her cry !! )
I am glad I was able to meet you and Olivia and spend a little time with you
I love that Tanya has so many great friends from all walks of life and it means so much that they and you think of her and us, and take the time to say 'HI'

Sunday 23rd February 2014 ... Gary Jackson

Hey, how you doing

Note from Sharon
Generally okay
This weekend we finally went through the boxes we took from Tanya's home and office ... it was pretty sad
I made her lots of cards and wrote lots of poems and letters and she kept them all in a box plus notes from her Dad
Was kinda nice to read them again
Miss her so much
I went on the NQ Adventure Sports website and there are some things on there I would like to do ... HERE
I feel a bit motivated after looking at Tanya's "Special Folder" where she kept all her fitness stuff ... I now keep that one close by
How about you ... your leg doing the right thing ??

Note from Gary
Yeah, starting to get better and strength back which is great ... will be able to run again soon I hope
I bet going through those boxes was hard

Note from Sharon
Broke our hearts all over again ... she's special and always with us ... nothing can take that away

Note from Gary
No, nothing can

Tuesday 25th February 2014 ... Jess Shuttleworth

Hope everything is as good as it could be and I very much miss my Saturday mornings at CrossFit

Note from Geoff
So sad sometimes
On Sunday Sharon and I went through some stuff from Tanya's home and office ... the things she kept, the notes she made
It was heartbreaking ... day by day, at times hour by hour
You can come back to crossfit, but Brett is charging $400.00/per hour now !!

Note from Jess
It's very sad ... I get very angry still and I hate that there is nothing I can do
Ha ha re Brett ... that's an investment !!

Note from Geoff
Jess, get angry and hate ... but do not ever say again that "there is nothing I can do"
You and all of Tanya's friends are what keeps Sharon and I going
You are all "doing things" by just being there, talking about her, and giving us support and maybe a chuckle or two with what you write and say
We can never ever thank you all enough
I don't want to have to travel to Townsville and yell at you about this, okay ??
Thanks for being there

Note from Jess
Okay, Geoff ... I just want her back

Note from Geoff
That is so nice, Jess ... so very nice
We do too, as every single day goes past ... miss her so bloody much ... time doesn't heal, it just makes it harder
You wanna talk or cry, you just ring me and I'll do the same !!

Note from Sharon
Over the years I made Tanya a lot of cards and wrote all sorts of poems ... it was a bit of a 'family joke' but she kept them all
Reading them on Sunday was nice but so dam sad at the same time.
The last one I picked up ended with "Live your life as best you can ... it doesn't always go according to plan"
Little did I know those words would be true for Tanya and us and her friends as well
As Geoff said, you all are what keep us going ... you are all wonderful
We love you and we love that you loved Tanya
Please come and see us when you come up one trip ... you might like to see Tanya and Geoff's room and also Tanya' Wall at Brett's house

Note from Jess
I will, and thank you so much

Friday 28th February 2014 ... Geoff to Tennille Denman

You've been "quiet" for a few days ... everything okay in your world ??

Note from Tennille
In the lead up to May I hate the world ... miss you guys

Note from Geoff
I like this ...

Note from Tennille
That's it
Why the 'f' is this world so unfair ?? ... can't get my head around it

Note from Geoff
I hate with all my being that there is nothing I can do about what has happened
But I have promised My Girl that she will have 'true justice' ... and she will !!

Note from Tennille
I hate it too

Thursday 6th March 2014 ... Jacqui Searson

I'm having 'roneberg' withdrawals
Hope you two are going okay
Saw your post today about the sentencing laws and I must agree
A case in Hobart concluded last week with a young man who was affected by cannibas walking free after killing a young girl who had just stepped off the school bus
The mitigating circumstances were that he is suffering post traumatic stress disorder and anxiety
So he should be ... he killed an innocent girl
My thoughts are with you both

Note from Geoff
So he should be suffering ... and suffering badly ... but it should be in a hard jail for many many years
As Sharon said, these cases end up with the 'murderer' becoming the 'victim'
I have promised Our Girl that she will have Justice, and it will be True and Final
Hope you are both going along okay ... and that Scott is continuing to "shake up and break" all the equipment in the gym !!
We really appreciate your continuing thoughts for us
So sad, but we get along, with "TMR" all around us and that's just where we want her to be

Note from Sharon
Hi Jacqui
It makes me so cross to see the penalties for these crimes ... I just want to scream !!
Hope you are all well
How is Scott doing ... is he enjoying his new found fitness ??
As Geoff said, we are getting along
Brett will be home this weekend and staying for the whole week so it will be nice to spend some time with him
Bye for now

Saturday 8th March 2014 ... Bethany Knights

Hi Sharon, and I went to the Psychic Expo yesterday ... just out of curiosity
I have been before and I used to tell Tanya what had been said and we'd analyse every single word
I have always kept an open mind about it ... not considering it to be 'gospel' but just something interesting for every now and then
I asked about Tanya and she said ...
......1 - it was a sudden death and Tanya would've just felt a small bump from behind and it was over before she knew anything that was
..................happening
......2 - her spirit didn't go up alone ... Tanya's grandmother came down to greet her and took her up
......3 - she's with family up there and she's in a good place
......4 - Tanya doesn't want you, Geoff and Brett to worry about her ... she is okay
......5 - Tanya comes to visit me and puts her arm around me
I hope it is okay that I'm sharing this with you ... I thought you might like to know
As I said, I'm not one hundred percent sure about psychics but I keep an open mind about it
This one did say my Dad was going to hurt himself doing something he shouldn't be and he needs to learn that he's older now and can't do things like heavy lifting by himself
She mentioned the injury would require surgery
Mum rang me this morning and told me that Dad lifted the deep freezer and fridge by himself and has torn the ligaments in his knee and chipped the bone
He got a scan and he needs to have surgery to fix his knee ... bit interesting !!

Note from Sharon
Hi Bethany ... does this sound like Tanya ?? ... OMG
Well, first I cried when I read it
Then I read it again and thought the words about Tanya could be a bit generic and suit many situations
But you were there and know what was said and how questions were asked
Your Dad's story is the clincher for me ... you can't pick that out of thin air !!
So that means it's all true and my girl is okay ... that's all I want !!
I love to think that my Mother came to meet her but it could have been Geoff's Mum !!
I love to think that Tanya comes to visit you and puts her arm around you !!
Thank you ... Thank you ... Thank you for sharing this with us !!
PS - hope your Dad is okay too

Note from Bethany
She said one specific thing ... she said that she could see Tanya up above wearing a pink tutu
I thought that was strange as Tanya hadn't mentioned ballet to me before
But then I remembered the intro of our favourite show ... the same intro for every episode !!
And we had definitely both watched every episode (Sex in the City)

Note from Bethany
And this from the movie, referencing the tutu again

Note from Sharon
Tanya is a smart girl !!
Specific things important to you both to make you believe
I really love it !!

Note from Bethany
I am feeling a bit comforted but also so curious still
I just wish she could pop down just once as I have so many questions for her
I miss her so much

Note from Bethany
Sharon ... random question, but what colour was Tanya's bike that day ??

Note from Sharon
White with pink tape on the handlebars ... that was so I could see her during a race
Better let me know why you want to know !!

Note from Bethany
What colour was she wearing ??
The psychic said she saw the colour pink ... could have been the handlebars ??

Note from Sharon
Don't know the answer to that, Bethany
And I have many questions too
The pink handlebars are specific to me however
She got them because I said I couldn't see her during a race ... all the bikes and helmets look the same
I am truly comforted
I think about the whole scheme of things and this world cannot be all there is
Until we are confronted with a tragedy we tend not to think too deeply about anything other than our own lives

Note from Bethany
Wow ... maybe she really did see Tanya !!
I'm so glad I saw her and I could share this information with you

Note from Sharon
Me too !!

Note from Bethany
xxx

Note from Sharon
Just one more thing
It’s a bit sad but when I drove past the incident site on that Saturday morning I knew it was Tanya because of the pink tape on the handlebars of the bike

Note from Bethany
That is sad and would have been so frightening
That convinces me a little more that the pink handlebars is what the psychic saw
We miss her so much but I feel more confident now that Tanya was okay when it happened and is safe and happy now
It’s a relief

Note from Sharon
It is a relief and I am glad you feel that way
I for one know I am going to see her again one day

Note from Bethany
We both will
And please excuse my language but I am going to hug the shit out of her !!
And then smack her for liking that bike so much
And then hug her again !!

Note from Sharon
Great plan !!